United Way of Knox County

Dear United Way Friend:

For twenty-two years I gave to the United Way through my job at Briggs never dreaming that I would one day be a recipient of services provided by United Way funding.

I am a Galesburg native and lifelong struggling reader despite the fact that I come from a family of educators including Phil Griffith, Mary Griffith, Maryann Griffith, and John Griffith.  People tried to help me learn to read, but it was always hard for me.  When people made fun of me because I couldn’t read, I became a bully.  I made it to the 12^th grade because of my athletic ability.  I dropped out senior year and got a job, got married, and raised a family.  Along the way I was a girls softball coach, and Boy Scout leader for several years earning the white square knot which is a very prestigious honor for a Boy Scout leader.

When I found out Briggs was closing I realized that I had no future without being able to read.  I went out to Carl Sandburg College and walked into the adult learning center, and turned around and walked back out.  I was scared to death.  Knowing I had to read I went out one more time in October 2000 and signed up for a volunteer tutor through the Literacy Coalition which is a United Way funded program.  My tutor made me feel at ease and showed me that people really cared.  Briggs closed in December 2000 and in January 2001 I enrolled in GED courses.  By the fall of 2001, I was also enrolling in college courses for a welding certificate.  I was working towards my GED, working with a literacy tutor, and taking college courses all at the same time.  

I obtained my GED and my welding certificate after interning with Midstate Manufacturing.  I was subsequently hired by Midstate Manufacturing and have been gainfully employed there for almost five years. 

I have continued my involvement with the literacy coalition by becoming a volunteer tutor, and I currently serve as the treasurer for New Readers for New Life of Illinois a state-wide adult learner organization.  I was also appointed this spring to serve a three year term on the student advisory council for Pro Literacy Worldwide.  There are six members worldwide to serve on this council.  My first role was attending a leadership and advocacy conference in Washington, D.C. in May where I spoke one-on-one with numerous Congressmen on Capitol Hill about the importance of literacy and adult education.   

This year’s United Way theme is Live United. Give. Advocate. Volunteer.  My story shows how I live united.  I urge you to do the same.  Please give, advocate or volunteer.

None of this would have been possible without the donations given to United Way.  These donations are very important to individuals that need help.  Once again personally I thank each and every one of you for the role you played in helping me.  Thank you. 

Sincerely,

Ben Bickerstaff

Paula came into the office in March. Safe Harbor provided assistance with an Emergency Order of Protection.  Shortly after the EOP, Paula and her abuser, Peter, reconciled. Six months later she returned seeking help to escape the abuse. Paula had told Peter to leave her home. Peter had left. However, Peter was harassing her, calling her names, and telling her that he would never leave her alone. Paula filed for a Plenary OP.  Paula, again, decided to reconcile with Peter and did not pursue her petition.

In December, Paula called after discovering that Peter was HIV positive and had been diagnosed during their relationship. Paula had not been informed. She stated that she needed to stay with Peter because she had no place to go.  They were living with friends and she would have to leave all of her personal belongings if she left Peter. Peter?s abuse had not stopped and Paula feared more abuse if she left. Paula voiced concerns over her HIV status, the chances of her being able to begin another relationship, and the changes of her being able to find someone who would love her. Paula obtained a POP.

The next March, Paula was back in the office. She and Peter were living together with friends. Paula wanted out. Paula began working with Safe Harbor to confront her barriers.  With the advocate?s assistance, Paula updated her safety plan and, this time, put it into action. Paula located safe housing, she stored her furniture and personal belongings in the friend?s basement; and Paula slowly began to see herself again as a strong woman. Paula?s OP was modified to protect her at her new address. When she went to retrieve her belongings, Paula found that Peter had removed much of her property. Paula continued to work with the advocate, filed a Rule to Show Cause to regain her possessions and to prepare for the hearing.

At the hearing, Paula represented herself. Paula provided the court with detailed lists of her belongings, as well as the value of each item. She testified, questioned witnesses, and confronted her abuser. Peter made a desperate plea to Paula for forgiveness and testified to his love for Paula. This time Paula did not listen. Paula stood her ground. Paula did not receive the Rule to Show Cause. However, the court ordered that her belongings be returned to her. The Judge commended Paula on her presentation of the case.

Weeks passed and the appointed time for her belongings to be returned approached. Peter made no effort to return the items to Paula. With the advocate?s assistance, Paula sent a letter demanding the return of her belongings and promising court action if the items were not returned. Within days, Paula had a truck filled with her household furnishings and some of the treasured items Peter had taken.

Paula grew stronger and she confronted the barriers that had prevented her from successfully leaving the past. Paula had an additional barrier that has not yet been mentioned. Paula is a woman with developmental disabilities. One of the items she was not able to prove that Peter has possession of was her class ring. She received the ring when she graduated from the special education program. This ring was precious to her as it symbolized what she could accomplish.

Paula would tell you that while she still misses her class ring, the biggest loss in the relationship was the temporary loss of herself; the loss of the strong woman that knew if she worked hard enough, she could accomplish anything.  Paula would tell you that the strong woman is back and she is committed to living her life violence free.